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Last Minute Adult Halloween 2017 Costumes

Trick or Treat! Today is Halloween, 2017. Thanks to the Politically Correct Police, many of the usual costumes for children and adults are now banned or considered to racist or in poor taste. If you have yet to choose a costume for yourself this year, here are a few last minute ideas. These require little make-up and only a few accessories, easily and cheaply obtainable. I have two suggestions for males, or those who wish to dress up as men. First is Giorgio Tsoukalos, the ′ancient astronaut expert′ from the History Channel series, ″Ancient Aliens″. For those of you more inclined for a challenge, how about forensic geologist, Scott Wolter. Another History Channel star, who hosted the series ″America Unearthed″. For you ladies out there, I suggest none other than Linda Moulton Howe, Queen of Cattle Mutilations and Chem-Trails.

 

 

 

First, here are tips for trying to pull off dressing up, and acting, like Giorgio Tsoukalos. You will need some wild hair! So that means a wig, or some work on your own. Giorgio is something of a snappy dresser, so figure a button-down shirt, tie and suit coat or sports jacket. For props, search the Internet and print up some pictures of pyramids and Mayan carvings of people, or beings, who resemble ancient astronauts. Crop circles and UFO pictures will also do. Depending on the weather, you might consider pinning the pictures on your jacket for more instant recognition, if any. I am willing to bet that at least half of the adults you bump into will recognize your costume, perhaps not by name but as, ″that Ancient Aliens guy!″

 

 

Next we have Scott Wolter. This one is a bit tougher. Make-up wise, maybe just a bit of gray in your hair, but beyond that, props are the key. Consider finding a smooth, flat rock and drawing a ′hooked-X′ on it with a wide marker. A big Sharpee should do. Or borrow some gray Play-dough or modeling clay and make your own. You can even carve the ′hooked-X′ in to make it look more authentic. Beyond that, chat up people about how America was visited by the Vikings, Knights Templer and the Chinese long before Columbus. If you are in the Great Lakes region, talk about how the Minoans traveled to Upper Michigan to mine copper 3,500 years ago. launching the Bronze Age in Europe.

 

 

Finally, for you ladies, Linda Moulton Howe also requires very little make-up. Here again, props and schtick are the keys to pulling this one off. Odds are that most people have heard about cattle mutilations. Likewise, many have heard of chem-trails. Especially of late with the new Fed-Ex ′Conspiracy Bookstore′ commercials. If you haven′t seen those yet, you must before taking to the streets. Linda has been around for many years talking about all things extraterrestrial and paranormal. As this is the night of ghouls, carrying pictures of mutilated cattle should not be too awkward. There are pictures of the Internet of of these, as well as more milder artistic renderings of UFOs beaming cows on board. You can also find plenty of ′chem-trail′ pictures, too.

 

I hope these ideas for last minute costumes make your Halloween 2017 a successful one. Just remember to stay in character and avoid eating black licorice. A new study shows those over 40 eating too much black licorice may suffer some health problems. That must be why Tara from ″The Walking Dead″ only eats red licorice. Have fun and as the old vampire, Sir Graves Ghastly, used to say, ″Happy Haunting!″

 

For more REAL NEWS and views, follow Andrew Zarowny on Facebook and on Twitter @mrcapitalist.

 

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Love Giorgio’s leather jacket with his scarf hang out under the jacket looking like a loincloth. He wears this when he explores ancient sites.

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